I’ve Written a Children’s Book About Joy. So Why Am I Crying?
My mother, Maxine, died from Alzheimer’s disease in 1997. But in truth, we began losing her long before her passing. Dementia is a cruel, progressive disease—there’s no healing, no recovery. Watching someone you love fade slowly, even when they are still physically present, is one of life’s most difficult heartbreaks.
Some days were good, others unbearably painful. When your own mother can’t remember your name, it cuts deeply. The emotional rollercoaster for her, for us, was relentless. It was especially hard for those managing the caregiving and in closest proximity to her, my sister, Pat, and my dad. I was some 1,500 miles away.
My mom has been at peace for over 28 years now, I believe fully healed and in heaven with our loved ones and those who’ve passed on before her. I’ve had time to grieve her loss and heal my own heart. But I will always miss her love and presence in my life every single day until we have our own heavenly reunion.
That part of the story is old news.
What’s new is that the persistent desire in my heart—to honor her life and raise money for Alzheimer’s-related causes—has finally come to life.
The result is Maxine’s Joy, a children’s book inspired by my mother’s life. All profits will support Alzheimer’s research and help families affected by the disease.
Along the Way
I was confident I could handle the logistics: writing the book, finding the perfect illustrator, navigating publishing and distribution, promoting it all on my own. I’ve managed and executed a number of creative projects before—I thought I had this covered.
What I didn’t anticipate was how emotional the journey would be.
My sister Pat and I have cried fresh tears as we sifted through memories of Mom. We’ve laughed too—reminiscing about her strength, her silliness, her joy. We’ve racked our brains trying to remember the details of her childhood: How young was she when she had to leave school and work in the fields? How did that not break her?
I recently learned about epigenetics—the science of how trauma can be passed down through generations. How amazing is that? I will proudly carry my mother’s burdens as a way of honoring her life and legacy.
Focusing on what made my mom so special—her unshakeable joy—has only deepened my love and admiration for her. Especially knowing all she endured.
The memory of a loved one can easily fade with time. Taking a deep dive into my mom’s life has made me feel closer to her. I’m delighted that my children and grandchildren will know more about her, too and future generations from the branches of our family tree.
I love that kids and families around the world will learn about joy through her story. That they’ll say her name, Maxine, and talk about what it means to chase after joy.
I hope it provides a ray of hope for families impacted by Alzheimer’s disease. That it opens the doors for productive, healing conversations between families, parents and children.
That it raises funding for Alzheimer’s research and causes.
I wasn’t prepared for the flood of emotion that would come, which keeps on flowing even as I write this.
A mother’s love is one of the greatest gifts we will ever receive. It’s a gift that keeps on giving but only if we hone in and realize the love is still very much there.
Love is love, it knows no earthly boundaries. It does not expire or fail to exist just because our loved one is no longer physically present.
“Love never fails.” — 1 Corinthians 13:8
And I thought writing a children’s book would be easy…
Maxine’s Joy is available on Amazon and wherever books are sold. All profits will be donated to various charitable causes supporting Alzheimer’s research and families living through the disease.